Letters to the Daughter I’ll Never Have navigates the gut-wrenching territory of a couple’s ultimate decision to opt out of parenthood. More and more women, and men, are choosing not to have children, but that choice is seldom a simple or easy one to make. In this book of letters to her imaginary daughter, Ashley Brown delves into the grief over what she’ll be missing out on—feeling a mother’s unconditional love; sharing stories and advice; and experiencing the fulfillment of creating a family with her husband of eight years, author and poet Nathan Brown. She also explains to her daughter the reasons for her decision and the fears and doubts about raising a child in today’s world. She even acknowledges the relief of certain challenges she’ll never have to face and sacrifices she won’t have to make. Sometimes brutally candid, sometimes funny and heartwarming, Brown’s letters take readers with her on the journey of arriving at this almost impossible decision all while celebrating love and family.
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Letters to the Daughter I’ll Never Have by Ashley Brown is a heart-opening wonder: a meditation on family, real life, marriage, friendship, and the bittersweet truth of a road not taken. She has beautifully and thoughtfully captured the anguish, rumination, clear-eyed hope, and grief in approaching one of the most important decisions we humans can make: to have or to not have children. Her willingness to be vulnerable is what makes these pages shimmer. This book moved me in unexpected ways. I already want to go back and read it again.
~ Beth Wood
Award-winning singer-songwriter, author of Ladder to the Lightand Kazoo Symphonies, winner of Kerrville Folk Festival New Folk Contest
As one who made the choice to not have children almost thirty years ago, I found not only resonance but compassion in Ashley’s celebration of all that connects us. Her letters are less about what might have been and more an invitation to look seriously at what it means to love one another, and what it means to choose to be family.
~ Milton Brasher-Cunningham
Editor, Church Publishing Inc. – New York, Author of This Must Be the Place: Reflections on Home and Keeping the Feast: Metaphors for the Meal.
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